Over the Long Haul: 8 Benefits of Running with your Spouse

Twinsies by accident!

When we started running (consistently) in 2009, we almost never ran together. Besides having 2 little kids at home (6 and 4), we didn't run very similarly:  different pace, varying times of the day, and contrasting workouts. Most of the time back then, one of us would run early, then we'd switch off so the other person could go. It was like that game “tunnel tag” we played duirng grade school recess, except we didn't crawl between each other's legs before heading out the door for a run, and it wasn't nearly as fun.

In the summer of 2015, we started running together more. Our kids were older (10 and 12) and it was easy to run at 0-dark-30 before they (or anyone sane) woke up. We could run 10 miles, stretch, shower, and make waffles before the kids slithered downstairs on a Saturday. Because we could run together, we decided to train for and run a race for our 15th Anniversary. Yep, we celebrated 15 years of marriage by running 31 miles. Nothing says “I love you” quite like sliding down a steep muddy hill and knocking your husband down like a bowling pin. And they say romance fades over time.

Crazy hill at Point Defiance 50K. Notice the rope!

Before 2015, when we did manage to get to run together, we called it a “Running Date.” If you're scoffing because you think a red-faced, sweaty husband is gross, then you're missing the point.

Let me tell you the 8 benefits of running with your spouse:

1. No travel time. After sleeping in a queen-sized bed for 20 years, we broke down and bought a king last spring. Holy rollover room, Batman. Now, we're a separated by 2 feet instead of 4 inches, but we still have zero time considerations when we meet for a run. Even running partners who are neighbors have to wake up a couple minutes earlier to allow for time to get to each other. We're already there.



I must be telling a joke. Point Defiance 50K

2. Safety First. Running alone has a lot of benefits, including time for personal reflection, choice of route, and easy pace decisions. Still, it is generally considered less safe. Not only do I feel safer having my husband with me as far as being attacked or robbed (I've hoped for years that robbers aren't interested in my Garmin or Scott's 150$ Altras), we feel safer just having another set of eyes to notice large roots or cars who refuse to stop. Red lights and stop signs don't matter before 7 a.m., apparently. I've screamed “SCOTT!” and grabbed his shirt, or had his arm across my chest more than once in the last two years.

3. It's a marriage, too. Running with your spouse can give you 45 minutes to 2 hours (or more!) of uninterrupted time to discuss important parts of your lives. For us, whether it's figuring out where to go on vacation, when to file the taxes, or how to manage a kid that won't stop lying, running together has afforded us time to privately talk about essential details of marital life. Or, tell each other dirty jokes; whatever keeps the spark alive!

4. Enjoy the Stillness. Since we've been married forever and we see each other a lot, sometimes we don't need to talk. It's nice to run with someone who understands that it's OK to be quiet. We don't feel the need for incessant gabbing and can enjoy the sounds of nature or get lost in our own heads for a couple of miles.

Warming up before a race and keeping to ourselves.

5. OMG. I need a “lookout.” There may have been a time (or two, get it?) when I needed to use the bathroom but there wasn't one! Frack!! Scott would have been a fantastic sentry. In real life, he's a business analyst, which has no similarities, but you gotta play the hand you're dealt, right? I'm telling you that he's wonderful at making sure “the coast is clear” and I have zero worries about copping a squat when he's there. This man saw two babies come out of me. Nothing that exits from me during a run compares to that!

6. Stay Gold, Ponyboy. In order to stay true to your running goals, running with your spouse can keep you honest. I'm a little bit competitive. That said, I'm also a human being who hates those cold, dark, windy, and rainy mornings as much as any normal person. It's slightly easier to pull the covers off in the morning if I'm heading to the track with Scott to run intervals on a blustery, cold morning. I can't look like a wimp in front of my man.

Baby, it's cold outside. Pretending to be tough for each other.

7. Divide and Conquer. Since we're often training for different events, which might mean different distances or different terrain (road vs. trail), we will sometimes do partial runs together. Last year, I was training to run 50 miles and Scott is sane so he wasn't. Scott would run five to 10 miles with me, then go grocery shopping (eat, shower, watch a movie), then come back to pick me up at the end of the trail. Yeah, we both felt spoiled; me because I didn't have to run out and back (or grocery shop), and Scott because he only had to run 5 miles instead of 25.

8. My hero. We've saved each other's bacon a couple of times in the last two years. Scott is awesome at bringing and carrying an extra light. Apparently, I turn my head a lot when I run so if I wear a head lamp, it's like a strobe and everyone gets dizzy. Scott is awesome with the headlamp or he'll carry knuckle lights so we can both see and avoid a skunk on the trail. True story and, gosh, isn't he sweet? I've saved his booty a couple times too by carrying WAY too much food or water for just myself. Dried apricot, Nuun, PB&J?

He's happy because I just shared my sandwich.

What about you? Do you run with your spouse?

Are there more benefits that I forgot to mention?

Are there other activities that you do enjoy doing with your spouse?

Road vs.Trail: A roadie's lessons from a year running trails

In the Fall of 2016, I lost my mind I decided that I wanted to challenge myself and spend 2017 running on trails. Just so we're clear, I am NOT a trail runner. I told a guy at the beginning of Mary's Peak 50-miler: “I'm just a 10K runner pretending today.” And, that wasn't far from the truth. My challenge was to do the kind of running that I'm not particularly good at and to culminate the experience by running a 50 miler. I ran 5 trail races in the last year, each one progressively longer:

• 8K (Kevin's Cup Trail Run, November 2016)
• 25K (Hagg Lake Mud Run, February 2017)
• 18 Miles (Hot Springs Trail Run, April 2017)
• 50K (Soaring Eagle Trail Run, May 2017)
• 50 Miles (Mary's Peak,Trail Run, June 2017)

After finishing the 50 miler, I ran a few shorter road races (5K, 10K) and got the itch to run a road marathon. My last marathon before this one was the Newport Marathon in 2015, so, yeah, I'm rusty. I selected the Mississippi Gulf Coast Marathon [MCGM] for 2 main reasons. First; my dad, brother, future sister-in-law and niece (along with numerous extended family) live very close to the course and second; the race is in December. Most marathons tend to be in the Spring or Fall which means training happens in the Winter or Summer. Since, MGCM is in December, training could happen during my favorite season: Fall. That sealed the deal.

I completed the Mississippi Gulf Coast Marathon this past Sunday. After spending a year running on trails, I noticed that there are a number of differences between racing on the roads versus the trails.

Here are the TOP 10 DIFFERENCES:

 

1. You make it hurt so good. Roads are hard on your feet! OMG. My feet. They hurt so terribly by mile 6, I wasn't sure I could actually keep letting them hit the ground for 20 more miles. A series of thoughts circled in my head:

• “Maybe these shoes have too many miles and there's no more cushioning.”
• “My feet didn't hurt at all during training.”
• “Is this road made out of solid concrete?”
• “I think my feet would feel better if I was just beating them with a hammer.”
• “Take faster steps so there's less contact time”
• “I've turned into a baby having been spoiled running races on mud and dirt the last 12 months!”
   

2. I'm going the distance. I'm going for speed. You can run a faster pace on the roads. Okay, duh. There are no slippery rocks to ski down, or sneaky tree roots to catch a toe on, and no crazy cliff edges upon which you are teetering between staying alive and breaking a bone, losing your front teeth or worse. Thus, you can go (a lot) faster. The problem, initially, was that I wasn't accustomed to running fast. That first “fast” training session, I thought my shoe was going to fly off. Dang! I re-laced my shoes and over the 16 weeks of training, I actually started running faster. What? You mean training works? Who knew?



Mile 20. I finally passed the runner behind me for good.



3. It's the thrill of the fight, risin' up to the challenge of our rival. People are WAY more competitive during road marathons vs. trails runs/ultras. “People” are more competitive? Hmm...OK fine, it's me. On Sunday, I spent at least 10 miles trading places with another female runner. Why would she not just relinquish and go away? She probably thought the same thing about me! During trail races, I would tell the people behind me that they could go ahead and pass me, but 9 times out of 10, the person would say, “Oh. I'm fine back here.” Nobody really cared about who was in front.

 

4. Be careful not to choke. Eating and drinking are more challenging during road races because I don't let myself stop. That means I am trying to take in fluids and nutrition while running. It's nearly impossible to eat or drink gracefully without choking, spewing, and later developing aspiration pneumonia. I was SOOO out of practice for doing this having spent a year taking my time fueling up at trail aid stations. On the roads, gels are fairly easy to swallow while running, but try drinking water or Powerade from a cup while running. Gah. At some point I ended up with Powerade in my eye. Don't ask.

Aid station grace at Mary's Peak

5. If it smells like funk. Elimination timing really matters. I have paranoia about having to pee (or more!) while racing a road marathon. I'm not going to wet myself, but stopping during the race is out of the question. Wearing Depends would cause more harm than good (I don't want to imagine the chafing), so I end up being obsessive about going beforehand. At the MGCM, I went through the port-a-potty line 3 times before the race. During an Ultra-marathon, the forest provides endless possibilities for relieving oneself, so it's essentially a non-issue.



Slow goin' on mossy rocks.
Kevin's Cup

6. I hear the clock tick. I care more about my finish time. It's true. Maybe if I felt like I was at all competitive during trail races (um, faster), I might care more about my time for those. Speed is not a priority. Like I've said, during a road marathon I don't want to stop to eat or go to the bathroom, whereas during trail race, I stop at aid stations and eat real food. During the trail races, I would stop and eat bananas, my homemade plantain waffles with almond butter, watermelon, dried apricots, and plantain chips. I also make “pit stops” to go potty if needed (usually at an aid station port-a-potty, but I can't swear that was always true).

7. Steady as she goes. It's easier to run a consistent pace on the roads. On the trails, there are just so many more variables. There are even things that cause injury and death: roots, rocks, cliffs, and hills that go up for 1200 feet at a time! My mile splits could vary by 10 minutes on the trail depending on the terrain and elevation change. On the road, mile splits might only vary by 30 seconds.





Laughing my way to the finish line
@ Hagg Lake

8. Why so serious? There is less smiling and laughing during the race. I've outlined above a few reasons why road marathons are more serious. I noticed that I was smiling in more in the pictures taken on the trail this past year than during my road marathons. However, I had a BIG smile when I saw my dad at the finish line on Sunday!

 

9. Our time is short. My training time for this road marathon was a million times shorter. I enjoyed time on the trails, but between driving to/from the trail and the longer time it takes to cover the distance, I found I was spending up to 3-4 hours a week longer in training to run a similar mileage.

10. Pain is inevitable, but suffering is optional. Sometimes, running long distances on a road or a trail looks the same near the end. Whether it's on soft single track in the depths of the coast range or on a road overlooking sandy beaches, the race can chew you up and spit you out. During the last part of any long race, there is always some carnage. People are walking, shuffling crying, trying to massage or stretch their legs. A guy I passed at Mary's Peak around mile 40 said, “This race is no joke!”

Yeah, after Sunday, I'd say no road marathon or trail ultra really ever is. 

Everyday I'm shuffling. Finish line @ Soaring Eagle 50K